Pleasure and Pain.
All animals attempt to gain pleasure, and avoid pain, as they exist in life. Pretty straightforward so far, right? Sometimes the motivation is solely the acquisition of pleasure, sometimes it’s the avoidance of pain, and on some rare occasions it can be both at the very same time. Now, sometimes things in nature can get a little strange when looking at it from this perspective, I mean, a male Praying Mantis (Mantis religiosa.) can’t copulate until it’s head has been forcibly removed. However, the lack of reproducing carries enough pain that it could be fair to surmise the decapitation being worth it…to him, or it I should say.
Now consider having a pet, what does every trainer know about the basics of getting an animal to act in a certain way? They of course use the power of pain and pleasure in order to reinforce certain behaviors they want to see. Using pleasure when their chosen animal exhibits behavior they want repeated, and inflicting pain when the animal exhibits behavior they wish reduced. However, there is also one more aspect we don’t want to miss, they may use indifference when the animal is exhibiting behavior which is neither deemed positive or negative.
In this case, we now have altered pleasure and pain into reward and punishment, and the paradigm of rewarding good behavior and punishing bad behavior has been around since the dawn of time. This same procedure can be easily recognized when looking at any group of people where a hierarchy exists. Parents teach their young using the reward/punishment method, teachers also use this on students whether in school or in other arenas such as martial arts or even apprentices. Coaches of all stripes, the military, even in the office this very basic but very effective methodology is as easy to recognize as sunlight.
If one looks at “powerful” civilizations of the past/present, you will notice many familiar patterns within them. You will see that chastity is rewarded amongst their women and leadership and morality are rewarded amongst it’s men. Lewdness, lasciviousness, promiscuity, and infidelity is not just treated with indifference by it’s people, but punished, harshly. Not only was learning these skills important and rewarded when young, but the teaching of those same skills was also rewarded when older. Consider the humiliation of the scarlet letter in the past, or even shotgun weddings. What do you think used to happen in ‘the good old days’ when Pa and his sons found out that little Judy got a black eye from her husband? Anyone want to wager that Judy’s brothers and father decided to give her hubby a little impromptu ‘sensitivity lesson’…personally? The ‘law’ of the land was going to be followed and what it made you feel like during these humiliating situations was of no consequence to society.
The goal here is self evident, reward positive behaviors and punish negative behaviors in your society in order to self regulate. Yes we are better than animals, we no longer sh!t on the floor and had toilet trained ourselves, but animals we are just the same at our cores and it was important to keep this in mind.
Reward, punishment, pain, pleasure, this is simply called incentive. The main motivator of why anyone, or any animal does anything in life.
As we can see in this society, why it’s in decline can be viewed by what sort of behavior is rewarded and punished. This has been repeated ad infinitum on the manosphere, how women’s behavior has changed and how they get rewarded for it so what I want to touch upon right now is men specifically. While I do understand that women have a poor grasp of cause and effect, I still am a little confused by their popular stance in regards to contemporary men. Women lament about the lack of good men but the current punishment/reward system in regards to men is completely @$$ backward.
Currently, most if not all of the positive behaviors which creates a steadfast, ambitious and virtuous young family oriented man is not only given no reward, not even shown indifference, but thoroughly punished, sometimes brutally.
“Nice” guys ground into pulp by the brutal and unforgiving dating market all the while watching all sorts of jack@$$es being rewarded with all sorts of women, time and time again. They fight the urge to ‘turn to the darkside’, but reward and punishment are very powerful motivators. Some drop out of the dating market all together, others leave ‘the Jedi’ ranks behind and become ‘Sith’.
Innocent men being falsely accused of rape and violence and no one lifting a finger to assist them. In fact, you see many men (and a scant few women) regularly receive punishments for standing up for what’s right and trying to remind society of the laws our forefathers put into place.
We avoid pain and embrace pleasure.
We see good husbands imprisoned in bad marriages and treated just like they where lazy ignorant partners. A good portion of the time these men are divorced and ripped to shreds in the family court system. They may not see their kids, or may even be jailed. A good portion of the time they become indentured slaves to their wives who more often than not have left them with no justified reason other than frivolity packaged as her birthright.
We avoid pain and embrace pleasure.
I want to stress something here very important, that there is a very large difference between men being shown simple indifference to “being good and mature” and being punished for it. A man may engage in looking to please women, continuing to woo them even if no positive or negative feedback is received. While men and women get married for primarily different reasons, men would still have decent motivations for marriage and continue to do so.
Essentially, men engaging in their prior behaviors of marriage and fatherhood carry too much risk, far too much punishment and not nearly enough reward. To take the position a la ‘The Thinking Housewife’ that honor is enough of a reward for men to engage in such risky ventures is to ignore the problem at large. MGTOW isn’t simply a catchy slogan; it’s the cold and hard truth that only by ignoring women and this society that a man’s own interests may be somewhat protected. So long as these risks are present, so long as the current society rewards negative behaviors in both men and women while punishing the positive ones, then catastrophe is the only thing which will get everyone’s notice. Men now have an incentive to AVOID marriage and cohabitation with women, this doesn’t bode well for women or society and simple foolishness like honor and shaming will not turn the tide of men saying no to the alter. You may of course ask, “Why don’t men tell women what the deal is in regards to current society? Why don’t men tell women that this situation will hurt them too?”